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A Sunny Place for Shady People

Pithy, contrarian, politically incorrect and curmudgeonly rants on sex, money, power and politics and religion and philosophy. In short: Nothing matters, everything changes and there are no guarantees. The rest is rationalization and bribery. (c) Tom Milner 2002-2003. DIRECTORY of offensive POSTS at Archives: 07/09/03. RECOMMENDED BLOGS: Archives: 07/29/03. email: theoldbuzzard AT sunnyplaceforshadypeople DOT com.

Thursday, October 03, 2002

Friday, October 04, 2002

No one can ever accuse this old buzzard of unfamiliarity with strong drink. Hell, since I started hiding my hooch in Listerine bottles at a Kentucky military school in the 50's, I've enjoyed (mostly) the excesses -- but not the hangovers -- of fueling a "whiskey problem."

This often shabby addiction -- it's called alcoholism -- has been damned costly to me all my life. Start with unhappy and alienated spouses, lovers and friends, an aborted Ph.D., numerous promising jobs and careers somehow mislaid -- not even mentioning the obscene amount of money just pissed away.

Solution? Not AA, with its pious crutches and embarrassing dependence, but just a simple resolve to learn to drink socially and moderately.

All you have to do, really, is to finally take responsibility for yourself. Once you drink sanely, you relish the sensate joy of the occasional (or even daily) libation.

But I'm not in the business or the habit of prescribing morals, behavior, sex, or anything else for other people.

Now I'm going to celebrate a hard week's writing with a very dry vodka martini or two, heavy with pregnant olives.

A votre sante!


Wednesday, October 02, 2002

Thursday, October 03, 2002

For Martha Stewart, the news yesterday of the government deal cut with her broker's assistant, could not have been worse.

Martha Martha Martha.

Greed Greed Greed.

Why bother even pilloring That Stewart Woman, little Miss Perfection, so delusionally demure in her dainty dandy tiny world of fashioned perfection.

This woman elevated the concept of Control into a tyranny of prudence and omnipotent nonsense about dicing salads, building gingerbread houses, remodeling patios, jerry-bulding household knick knacks, ad nauseam.

But she couldn't control that stock market, although she tried to outfox it by acting selfishly on alleged inside information, while the rest of us imperfect morons lost our butts.

Bye, Martha.

NOTE: This rant will hereafter be published Monday to Friday only.
Thanks for your visit.

Tuesday, October 01, 2002

Wednesday, October 2, 2002

Most movies released in the past ten or even twenty years are essentially just cinematic comic books: exaggerated violence and sex, bizarre plots supplanting character development, or children's and ladies' films engorged with contrived gush, mush and slush.
In other words: lots of special effects and sentimentality -- no ephiphanies.

We know that the audience for pictures is primarily the ill bred, militantly ignorant young trash who pass for today's "modern youth."

Of course, book publishing is not immune to these same diversions.

We search fruitlessly for the maturely dramatic and meaningfully entertaining drama both in films and books. (This does not mean we venerate the sanctimonious and self-righteous.)

We recommend renting and viewing a film like "BAD DAY AT BLACK ROCK," a 1950's "Western" with classic intimations.

NOTE: This rant will hereafter be published Monday to Friday only. And thanks for the visit.

Monday, September 30, 2002
This column is for TUESDAY, OCTOBER 1, 2002

We were anticipating a break from the dreary political soap operas to opine about the dreary state of movies and books today.
Then the news broke about the Sen. Torricelli (D-NJ) mess.
The pols insist on feeding the press sharks.

Control of the Senate does matter -- a lot. It matters simply because of the advice and consent clause of the Constitution regarding nominees to the U.S. Supreme Court -- and the Court touches just about everyone. Not always where you want to be touched.

So: the race is on.
Not for the U. S. Senate from NJ.

The race is on to see which party can bribe (or cajole with liquidity) the necessary number of NJ State Supreme Court justices who will determine whose name will be on the Democratic ballot line in November's election.

And NJ has always been fertile boodle ground for this kind of "business as usual" arrangements.

The election itself is thus probably an anticlimax to the graft germinating even as we speak.

Go to it boys. Money always tells.

The Democrats are failing to assemble a luminous roster of pretenders to the presidency in '04.
~Gore the Bore (who fizzled in '00 and should just fade away...........)
~His Holiness Joe, the Overly Pious Lieberman (do we really want a prez who takes his religion so personally?)
~The Great Straddler and Professional Veteran Sen John Kerry
~The Whining Wimp Daschle
~The Weathy Prince of New England, the Overly Earnest Gov. Howard Dean
~The Saponaceously Handsome Plantiff's Mouthpiece Sen. John Edwards
~The All Too Very Reverand Al Sharpton, challenging the supercilious extortionist Jesse Jackson for "King" of the Blacks.
Count Princess Hillary the Harridan out of this race. She's "banking" on '08.

Sunday, September 29, 2002
Any president of the U.S. who has a nine o'clock bedtime, is terrified of taking a social drink, speaks casually of "evil," who is inarticulate and barely literate, and who sucks the teats of big oil (and other corporate monoliths) -- well, this frat brat should be called out in '04.
If he were not so dangerous, he could be dismissed as just another ineffuctual Republican Sunday School s.o.b..

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